The K-Y Brand and myself are teaming up to answer your sex and relationship questions. This new application on facebook is completely anonymous and 100% FREE! I will be recording personal video responses to your questions, so check-er out and ask away!

Link to the New Free K-Y Brand Question and Answer Facebook Page<

The Breakdown
Size by Colour Range: From the largest, which is dark green 16.10-17.93cm (6.3-7.1 inches) to the smallest, which is dark red 9.66-11.67cm (3.8-4.6 inches).

The Truth
According to a study done in 1996 by urologists at San Francisco General Hospital – There is no correlation between the length of a man’s penis when flaccid and the same penis when erect.
The average penis is between 4-6 inches in length, and according to a common medical rule of thumb, anything within two standard deviations of the mean is “normal”. In vaginal penetration, the dimensions of the penis are almost irrelevant, because the elasticity of the vaginal wall makes it a “one-size-fits-all” organ and in anal and oral penetration, a small penis may actually be an advantage.

In general, the significance of penis size lies only in the mind…..

Every teacher, child, teen, parent, or soon to be parent, needs to watch this educational film!!!
More info on this amazing program from TLC entitled “Lets Talk About Sex” can be found at www.letstalkaboutsexthefilm.com

But what is semen?

Well as I’m sure most of you know, semen, or seminal fluid, is a thick, off-white liquid ejaculated from the male urethra at sexual climax. But what you may not know, is that sperm only account for approximately 1% of the total volume of the semen. A single ejaculation usually ranges between 2-5 millilitres (1 tsp), and contains between 100-700 million sperm.

Why such a vast difference in the number of sperm? Well ones sperm count can be affected by many things, such as wearing tight fitting pants/underwear, spending too much time in hot tubs, continuous heating of the testes due to strenuous exercise, and consuming many environmental pollutants (such as agricultural pesticides). Side note: According to research the average sperm counts in several Western countries dropped by nearly one-half between 1940-1990. A drop in ejaculate volume was also detected. Environmental toxins have been suspected to have contributed to this wide spreading effect on sperm in the US, Canada, and other countries over the last several decades.

So if sperm only account for 1% of the semen, where does the other 99% of the seminal fluid come from? Well about 70% comes from the seminal vesicles, approximately 30% from the prostate gland, and less than 1% comes from the testis. And within this mixture, there is a large degree of fructose (sugar), calcium binders (citric acid), enzymes, vitamins and antioxidants.

Semen Chart

Yes we all know antioxidants and vitamins are good for us, but so is a shot of wheatgrass and fish oil and I don’t see many men falling to their knees for a taste of those two. So what is the take home lesson of the day? Gentlemen’s relish does have some good properties, but seems to be decreasing by the decade. So what can we do? Buy organic, keep the family jewels in a spacious, cool environment, and help put Mr. Kleenex’s kids through college by refreshing the bodily supply often.

In just over a decade, the federal government has invested more than $1.5 billion dollars in strict abstinence-only programs (which were the only sex education programs eligible for federal funding).
Statistics:
• Among youth participating in “virginity pledge” programs, researchers found that 88% broke the pledge and had sex before marriage. Furthermore, once pledgers began to have sex, they had more partners in a shorter period of time and were less likely to use contraception or condoms than were their non-pledging peers.
• Evaluations of publicly funded abstinence-only programs in at least 13 states have shown no positive changes in sexual behaviors over time.
• No abstinence-only program has yet been proven through rigorous evaluation to help youth delay sex for a significant period of time, help youth decrease their number of sex partners, or reduce STI or pregnancy rates among teens.
• The U.S. House of Representative’s Committee on Government Reform led by Rep. Henry A. Waxman released a report showing that 80% of the most popular federally funded abstinence-only education programs use curricula that distort information about the effectiveness of contraceptives, misrepresent the risks of abortion, blur religion and science, treat stereotypes about girls and boys as scientific fact, and contain basic scientific errors.

Why should we care?
- Experts estimate that about one young person in the United States is infected with HIV every hour of every day. And that nearly 15% of the 56,000 annual new cases of HIV infections in the United States occurred in youth ages 13 through 24 in 2006.
- The NCHS reports a 5% national increase between 2005 and 2007 in teenage birthrates in the U.S; from 40.5 to 42.5 births per 1,000 young women aged 15-19.

Thank you Obama!
For FY10 – removing the streams of funding for abstinence-only programs, and creating funding for programs which have been proven effective at reducing teen pregnancy, delaying sexual activity, and increasing contraceptive use.
And for starting on a path that would put an end to the teachings demonstrated in the videos above!

Middle Sex Series
Part 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHp3sHkE1bc
Part 3: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AoYo9Syc8g4
Part 4: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jaPsiGutGPQ
Part 5: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AEjgUt9u39U
Part 6: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Xq8fFtAzR8
Part 7: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bmKAnpF0zS4
Part 8: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F1o_hXcHWAI
Part 9: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LC5UTozpa4
Part 10: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qb_sPmd6DnE

“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.” ~Jalal ad-Din Rumi

Rape-Axe – as its name implies – was designed by Dr Sonnet Ehlers as a rape deterrent for women in South Africa (which has the highest rape rates in the world; 28% of men having raped a girl/woman in their life, and 1 in 20 of these men claiming that they have raped in the last year!).

The condom is meant to be pre-inserted by the woman when she feels nervous regarding her surroundings, adding an extra layer of unseen protection for the woman’s conscience. Once this special ‘reliance appliance’ has become latched onto a penis, it can only be removed by a doctor, with authorities on standby.

I’m suddenly feeling a MasterCard commercial ‘cuming’ on:
Condom Price: $2 dollars
Evening out on the town: $47 dollars
Hearing a would be rapist scream while the doctors surgically remove a piece of his private parts…… Priceless

On one particular evening when Mrs. Johnson was hitting a solid G6 in her vocal range, I pondered the effect the Johnsons were having on our other neighbor’s assumptions about the normality of sex within a long term relationship. Were these couples inflicted two-fold with the inevitable question of how often they ‘should be’ having sex? And what other factors lead us to want to classify what is normative in the bedroom?
Whats Normal?!
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Many women have stepped into my office with their husbands in tow, wanting nothing more than my support in justifying their anger with the fact that their significant other plays sexual solitaire. I listen attentively, commiserate with them for finding out the shocking truth, and then turn to their husband and say, “Congratulations for taking a step towards good health, I commend you in your actions. Keep up the solo work”.

Once the look of shock has firmly planted itself upon their faces, I take the lead in explaining all the health benefits to self-loving and why it is extremely important for the husband to continue in his quest for good sexual health by ‘getting in touch with himself’ on a regular basis.

Self-loving may do more for your partner than hitting the gym.
The Top 5 Reasons Why its Important for Men to Keep Up the Solo Work
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As a sex therapist, I get many books on love, sex and relationships crossing my desk. Some linger and are reread multiple times, while others are read, scoffed at and then tossed quickly from my sight. This is a list of the former: Five books that either caught my eye, educated my mind, opened my networks to invaluable dialogue, or simply stimulated my sex craving curiosity button for more than a fleeting moment. Here they are:
Top 5 Books on Sex, Love and Relationships
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On more than one occasion this summer I sat around a roaring bonfire and praised the maker of the Graham Cracker. For me, biting into a delicious smore is like an orgasm of the mouth; the melted chocolate, marshmallow and cracker combine to produce nothing less than a cascade of happiness for my taste buds. However, it wasn’t long ago when the makers of the Graham Cracker would have been appalled to learn of its current use, and my salacious “relationship” with its fine product. Why you ask? Keep reading to find out, the answer may shock you!
Test your sex savvy with the following ten shocking sexual facts

VAGINA – It’s Not A Clown Car

It would be a service to mankind if the pill were available in slot machines and cigarettes were placed on prescription. ~Malcolm Potts, MD

In Sex and the City Carrie was dumped via a post-it note. Harsh? Yes, but nowadays, there’s worse. A man by the name of Bradley Laborman, from IDUMP4U.com, is paving new ground in the break up scene by doing the dirty deed for you for a measly $10. May seem cheap, but Bradley’s getting his fair share out of the deal as he tapes his phone conversations and then posts them online for all to hear (check out the link above entitled ‘Bradleys Work’ to hear a short clip).

In Bradley’s eyes, he is performing a service by delivering the exit line for you. And surprisingly, many women agree, as women are his number one clientele. So what is the main driving force for using the service? “It’s fear”, Bradley claims, “I had one guy who couldn’t do it because every time he tried to do it, he’d end up having breakup sex with her and get back together. I think a lot of them have tried a couple times to break up with the person, and it’s just not getting through to them.”

Ok, so getting a phone call from a complete stranger telling you your relationship is over, pretty cold. But what about getting an anonymous ecard informing you that you may have an STI (Sexually Transmitted Infection)?!

‘Hello Sarah, I’m so sorry to inform you that you might have an STI. We had fun but now we’re done and I’m sorry to say that I ‘came’ with strings attached. Tests reveal I have herpes. Please get tested.’

Anonymous egreetings can now be sent to your past sexual partner(s) explaining your current ‘situation’ down below. The program that is facilitating the ecards is called inSPOT, a non-profit organization dedicated to developing and using Internet technologies to prevent disease transmission and enhance the sexual well-being of individuals and communities. Now I know what you’re thinking, who wants to receive an impersonal ecard telling them they might have an STI?! Well no one, of course. But this program might be the best option when considering your choices. One, don’t tell any past partners and live with the guilt that you helped spread an infection (possibly life threatening or fertility affecting) to others. Two, tell them in person that you are the reason for the burning sensation between their thighs. Or three, send them an anonymous ecard with an apology and a list of all the closest STI clinics in their area.

IDUMP4U.com and inSPOT may be harsh in their delivery systems (I think Bradley gets a woody from delivering the bad news…. yes you do Bradley, just admit it), but don’t many adhere to the statement that all’s fair in love and war?
Or possibly – insert Jack Nicholson – YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

Smirking or Non Smirking

Sex education has become a passion of mine since I started in the field. Perhaps it’s the combination of public speaking and the shock value I get from candidly discussing everything sexual that I enjoy so much. Or maybe it’s the feeling that arises when I can see light bulbs click on over the heads of the audience. Either way, I’ve come to enjoy the expressions that result from the words “Does anyone know what this is for?” (as I hold a 4 foot flogger in my hand), or “Let’s talk about all the health benefits to masturbation”.

Now don’t get me wrong, not all of my presentations have been hugely successful. I’ve fallen on my face while attempting to show the proper whipping techniques, I’ve ripped a condom while trying to demonstrate safe sex practises and I’ve offended a gorgeous transsexual woman by not using the proper cis-gender terminology. However, through these highs and lows I’ve learned a lot and I’ve gained an even deeper passion and appreciation for the sex education movement.

Because of this passion, and the fact that I’ve “NEVER” met a person to date that hasn’t had at least one sexually related question to ask me, yes thats a quote… and you can quote me on the quote unquote I’ve decided to extend the blog page to include your questions. Please feel free to write me any sexually related quagmire you may have in the ‘Ask Teesha A Question’ section of this page.
(All questions asked will receive a detailed response, and will be treated with strict client/counsellor confidentiality)

So, click on the link and spill your guts because I know you’ve been wanting to ask somebody!

Ask Teesha a question!

During Sydney’s summer games people were provided with 70,000 condoms and ran out! Beijing brought in 100,000 but had 5,000 left over. So what’s the lucky number? Well apparently in Vancouver its 14.6 condoms for each of the 6,850 athletes. Assuming that most condoms are used by couples, that works out to 29 encounters in 2 weeks, or 2 a day!

So why the condom spurge and sex extravaganza? Well, experts say it’s a combination of things. The fact that many athletes abstain from sex before the games, and that a large number of them don’t have steady partners because of their dedication to the sport (therefore they are more able to ‘hook up’ afterwards). Also many of the athletes are surrounded by alcohol, the party atmosphere and are constantly meeting new people.   

Ok so those reasons may seem obvious, but what isn’t is why we’re so interested in the athletes condom usage. Is it because we are bombarded with mysterious and alluring sexual imagery in media daily, and this imagery is almost exclusively tied to young, fit people… So athletes are sexy by definition? Are we just a sexually curious species, voyeurs by nature? Or is it because when it comes to sex, many people feel as though they are somehow missing out on something? Sex is sold to us as this amazing, mind blowing out-of-body experience. When in reality it’s usually messy, sometimes awkward and – for women especially – often lacking an orgasmic ending.  

Well regardless of the reason, I’m elated condoms are on the ‘must have’ list. As STI’s don’t discriminate, and the world is over populated enough. Although you can’t argue the fact that those athletes would produce some genetically gifted individuals!  

“Condoms aren’t completely safe…. A friend of mine was wearing one and got hit by a bus!” ~ Bob Rubin

Wanna Bite?

Recently I was sent the book Natural Harvest – A Collection of Semen Based Recipes. The author proclaims that “Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist. If you are a passionate cook and are not afraid to experiment with new ingredients – you will love this cook book!”

The ‘Gourmand World Cookbook Award’ nominated book does present a plethora of recipes and tips for cooking with semen. However, my question isn’t so much why someone would want to cook with semen (as I personally feel that drinking milk that was squeezed from the teat of another animal isn’t that much better), but rather how consistent is semen as an ingredient? As sexual scientists we’ve studied the precarious nature of semen and its changing consistency between people and within each person throughout their lifespan. Some semen is quite acidic (such as the ones that leave yellow stains on a man’s ‘hanky’ socks/towels from his ejaculate) some semen sweet. Sweet is of course a relative term, as semen usually doesn’t taste like lollypops. But my point is, if a man is living on fast food and beer as opposed to fresh fruit and veggies, his semen is going to present with vastly different flavour properties. So, can we really trust the ingredient to taste as the chef intended it to? Or will each of these recipes be dependent on the donors’ lifestyle?

A quick sidebar before you try the Natural Harvest recipes, I should point out that the sous-chef (for lack of a better term) must not have a Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI), a contagious blood borne disease, acute long term exposure to poisons, heavy metals, radiation or intravenous injections. The receiver must also be careful that they are not allergic to the semen, have cancer tumours that could contact concentrated ejaculate, or are sensitive to testosterone. However, if you and your partner are both free of the above constraints and want to try some tasty new recipes, please feel free! I would love to hear your reaction to the dish you made, and whether or not you’d recommend it to others…. as I think I might sit this one out.